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Lactation War

“He sucks my breasts with the milk like our baby does,” stated Franca, with confusion written all over her face.
Kate Halim
“I have a problem but I am ashamed to say this,” Franca whispered to her friend.
What is it?” Gloria asked fussing over her friend’s worried look.
Franca hesitated for a while because she was battling within herself whether to tell Gloria the secret she had been keeping for months. She exhaled and dropped a bombshell. “My husband sucks my breasts and enjoys the breast milk meant for our seven-month-old son.”
Day man grabbed my boobs at Yaba market –Seun Omojola
Gloria’s eyes widened in disbelief! She didn’t imagine her friend would be going through such a situation. Though what she heard caught her off-balance she comported herself because her friend needed her advice and not her shock.
“Do you mean he sucks your breasts alone or he drinks the breast milk?” she asked Franca, still trying to be sure she heard her correctly?
“He sucks my breasts with the milk like our baby does,” stated Franca, with confusion written all over her face.
“But that is not normal,” quipped Gloria. “Your breast milk is for your baby and not for your husband. He’s an adult who doesn’t need the nutrients in breast milk, so why is he doing this?”
Franca told her friend that her husband says he loves the taste of breast milk and he sucks it too because he heard it keeps men young, agile and virile.
Gloria has heard enough. She told her friend that if she’s not comfortable with how her husband is competing for her breast milk like her baby, she should simply tell him to stop. So? Who owns the breast: husband or the baby? Sonny Okosuns of blessed memory sang a song, wanting to know who owns the land, Papa’s land. Maybe one of these days a new artiste is going to sing wanting to know who owns a woman’s breast.
Fathers and babies compete for wives’ breast milk
Some women have been complaining about the big fight between their husbands and babies over their breast milk albeit in hush tones and among trusted friends or on social media where their identities won’t be revealed.
These women claim that it makes them uncomfortable when their husbands suck breast milk like their babies do. Even though they find it bizarre, they state that their men don’t see anything wrong with their actions.
Mrs. Carolina Ayoola (not real names) is not happy with her husband of five years. He is denying their four months old baby his breast milk. Whenever she’s breastfeeding their baby, her husband, moves over to the other breast and start sucking away.
“The first time it happened, I was too shocked to react. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. I kept looking at him and asking him what he was doing but he ignored me and continued with his job,” Mrs. Ayoola revealed.
For months, her husband sucked breast milk like their toddler without flinching. Whenever she confronted him about how abnormal his actions are, he reminded her that she’s his property and her breasts belong to him first before their baby.
Isioma Enebeli’s husband is fond of sucking her breasts whenever she’s breastfeeding a baby. He claims that he loves the taste of breast milk more than anything in the world because his late mother breastfed him till he was seven years old and in primary school.
Whenever she objects to his actions, he threatens to send her back to her people because her breasts belong to him because he paid her bride price.
“One day, our baby was crying so much at midnight because he wanted to suck but my husband insisted on sucking my breasts first before our daughter who was just six months old at the time. I was so embarrassed with his actions that I started crying,” Enebeli revealed.
Enebeli, the mother of a boy and a girl stated that she hasn’t summoned the courage to tell any family member what she has been going through whenever she’s nursing a baby. She said it was such a shameful thing for another person to hear.
For Beatrice Martins, whenever her five months baby is done sucking, her husband takes over. He curls up to her and grabs her breasts and begins sucking away as if his life depends on it. Martins, who is a first time mom is still dazed and confused about her husband’s unusual cravings for their baby’s breast milk. She refused to let him suck her breasts one day and they had a big fight.
“How can I tell my family or his that the reason for our big fight is his love for breast milk,” she asked. “I try as much as possible to not breastfeed our baby in his presence these days. I can’t stand what he is doing, it’s nauseating,” Martins said.
Hard knocks for men who suck breast milk
In August this year, a Minister of State, Hon. Sarah Opendi lashed out at men who seek breast milk from their wives. The minister blamed men who suck their wives’ breasts only to leave their babies starved.
“Men are part of the problem during breastfeeding because they also want something on the other side,” she said. “Breastfeeding is the best start of life; it provides nutrition for babies and protects them against disease,” she stated. Sarah Opendi blamed the vice on societal myths and beliefs that claim breast milk improves ‘manhood power.’
Breasts belong to us, not our babies – men
“God knows how much I love my woman’s breasts,” reveals Amos Irede. “That was how my first child was just grabbing the nipples one day and you need to have seen my anger, jealousy and fury. In fact, all my kids must leave my woman’s mountains of pleasure before they are seven months so that I can enjoy what belongs to me.”
Irede revealed that he doesn’t play with his wife’s breasts at all and neither is he willing to share them with even his kids. Whether or not she’s breastfeeding or lactating, there’s no holiday from sucking her breasts.
He said: “Sometimes she breastfeeds two people at the same time-the baby and me. She knows clearly the inestimable value I place on them and she knows better than to object to my sucking and enjoying her breast milk.”
Mr. Andy Bassey, a computer analyst in Ilasa, Lagos told Saturday Sun that there should not be a hard-and-fast rule concerning who owns the breast or who should be banished from the breast during the time of breastfeeding but that the father and the baby could come to some sort of negotiation on the sharing ratio and duration.
“The urge to head for your wife’s breast is always there and then you taste milk or you suddenly hear the baby cry,” he said. “The baby owns the breast but hemust suck responsibly. The baby’s ownership term must also be defined but the father can also enjoy some milk with the baby.”
Oluleye Adeyemi insists that there is no competition because the woman’s breasts belong exclusively to the man. “Babies can’t take over what belongs to dad. We are the original owners of the breasts of our wives. We have been sucking our things before our babies started coming. So we can as well enjoy the breast milk with them too,” he said.
According to the air conditioner mechanic, the moment you are married legally, you have control over the body of your wife. It is normal and not a sin. Some nutritionists also claim that breast milk is also good for men.
Doctors’ position on the matter
A medical doctor, Dr. Peter Okorocha insists there is absolutely nothing wrong with adults taking breast milk since it is very nutritious. “Breast milk is made up of 90 per cent water and other nutrients so it is very harmless. In fact in the real sense, it is even the best milk one can take.”
The doctor also advised that the woman must take a lot of fluids and eat balanced diet in order to ensure that her milk is healthy and flows properly all the time.
Another doctor, Godwin Akinhanmi stated that whatever works for a couple should not be condemned by others. He said that even though it may seem abnormal for men to suck breast milk, there’s no law stating that it is a crime.
According to Akinhanmi, some men suck breast milk because they are curious about the taste and want to enjoy what their babies are enjoying. “Women should know that there’s no medical implication when their husbands suck their breasts while they are nursing their babies. Just as breast milk is healthy for babies, it is also healthy for husbands.”
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